Celebrities

Sparks Of Insanity By Vinny "Bond" Marini Friday, May 04, 2007

FINALLY, IT IS HERE



CHECK OUT THE SCHEDULE OF GUESTS
HERE

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Ah, those wacky celebrities...Now, let's think about it...Many of them were born into home's just like ours.

OK, sure some like Paris Hilton grew up in a home the size of all of ours put together, but for the most part, these people had semi-normal childhoods.

Then, due to the aligning of the moons, or a lucky break, they have become rich and famous. Now in the olden days (YES, even before THE COUCH was born), Hollywood, Musical and Sports stars were treated with respect by the media.

But that was before cable TV and instantaneous news. Today, if a celeb is arrested, or makes a social faux pax, there is a civil servant ready to dial a phone to alert the media or a normal person - like me and you- standing ready with a cell phone to snap a picture.

On top of that there are the PAPARAZZI. Those men and women whose only lot in life is to stand around outside celebrity homes, or restaurants or hotels, or nightclubs, just waiting for that one photograph that will make them hundreds if not thousands of dollars...

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Now, some say it comes with the territory. If you are going to get paid millions of dollars to make a movie, or record an album or play a game, then you should know that your life belongs to the public.

Others say that is total crap...

Here on THE COUCH,
we don't really think about whether it is right or wrong,
we just love to laugh about it...

What is IT, you ask....

Yup...IT is that

ONE FREEZE FRAME


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We have investigated and there are no rumors to the truth
that Brenna Gethers

is Fantasia's new stylist

Ummmmm - Or maybe she is.....can you say bad bad choice??????

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Tony Parker tells Kobe all about that "special thing" Eva can do...

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Danny DeVito
demonstrates how,
when he rubs his dog's back,
the left hind leg begins to shimmy and shake....











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"OK, I remembered to put them on. This time, no photos without panties as I get out of the car."

We found these quotes and had to share. They come from an interview in "NYLON" Magazine.
Can anyone say delusional?
"The thing about the press and why they need to leave me the [bleep] alone for a little bit is because I don't want that distraction from my work. I want to get a nomination. I want to win an Oscar. I want to be known for more than, like, going out. For being 'the party girl.' I hate that. I bust my [bleep] when I'm filming, and when I gave time off, yeah, I like to go out and dance."
Then, she says...
Other times, I obviously like it ... I wouldn't ever want them to not take my picture ... I'd be worried. I'd be like 'Do people not care for me?'?
OOO OOO can we answer? NO they don't!
But we Lovvvvvvvvvvvve to make fun!


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"If I eat this one hot dog, I am good for a week."

Folks, this is the epitome of what the paparazzi do.
Seriously, taking pictures of a poor-lil-rich girl eating a

NYC "dirty-water dog"???


Then again, if they didn't take the picture,
we couldn't make fun of it!








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Kobe gets called for a double dribble

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"Where the hell did I put that room key?"











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There is absolutely NO truth to the rumors
that K-Fed extorted so much money from Brit
that she is now "working the strip" out
Hollywood way... none what so ever...

But then again, we have seen the hookers on 9th Ave.
in NYC with better outfits!









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Will the real Carnie Wilson PLEASE stand up....
BEFORE............AFTER...............TODAY
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"Hey, you awake in there? This call is for you.
They might have another role like "Boogie Nights" for us.
Come on...WAKE UP!"











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"I know it's showing...
Take the damn picture so I can check it out,
we really aren't brother and sister, ya know."










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AND FINALLY FOR TODAY...
This is the scariest video we have seen recently..




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Tonight
Derek Trucks
Gov't Mule
The Allman Brothers
AND
"THE KILLER" Jerry Lee Lewis

Have a great weekend!

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CREDITS:

All photos as noted


FREEZE FRAME
J. Geils Band
Paul Justman
Peter Wolf


27 Of Your Sparks

  1. Gail Says:
  2. Ummm, why is Tony Parker's hand in his pants?

    And what's with all the celebs and their crotches? Don't they realize that America is watching?!?

    OY!

     
  3. GAIL: I had hardly posted and there you were... and I told you what Tony was doing... LOL

     
  4. Great collection of photos, Bond. I'll have to show my kids that, "See, they're normal people! They're just tackier than most. Quit thinking they're something special!"

    I agree - that video is pretty damn scary. Of course, anything with Rosie is scary these days...

     
  5. That is an extraordinary amount of celebrity self fondling. I'm impressed.

     
  6. TopChamp Says:
  7. I wonder if they really are all just weird... or whether it's just because EVERY LITTLE THING they do is broadcast and photographed? I'm pretty sure (with the exception of Brit. & Nicole who are clearly genuinely nuts) that we've all done just as daft/embarassing things ourselves but have escaped attention...?

    Now Ms Spears - Can't get over that outfit... it's unbelievable. I hear she's making a comeback soon - I'll look forward to the couch-fodder it will no doubt create!

     
  8. SONGBIRD: Video gave me shivers

    108: Well, I could not decide to put those up or the collection I have of me fondling myself...

    TOPCHAMP: Exactly my point, of course we have, though there are not photogs following our every little movement, be they professional or amateur.
    Good old Brit does love those cowboy boots, every shot I find of her has her wearing them.

     
  9. Travis Cody Says:
  10. This would be the reason I don't read celeb news. All I really want from them is good movies, good tv, good music, good sports, etc.

    They can share their talent, but I don't want into their lives.

     
  11. Schmoop Says:
  12. Very Good V-Man. I laughed until the Rosie thing...and then I wept. Tears...tiny, tiny tears. Cheers!!

     
  13. Bond: Ummm.... you can feel free to just email me those ones privatly.

    LOL!!!

     
  14. Piacere Says:
  15. Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!!!! I woke up to Rosie O'Donnell being fondled???? PUH-LEEZE!!! Not before my coffee and Prozac!!!

    Oh, and btw...the word out is that Brit will be at the HOB here in Vegas on Sunday night...and I'm leaving on Sunday afternoon...WHERE IS THE JUSTICE IN THIS WORLD??? ***SNARF***

    Great pics, Mr. B...good to see that the celebs have a lot of self-loving going on!!!

    SMOOCH!!

     
  16. AtriaBooks Says:
  17. Show me that pic of Meadow again but this time without the censorship!!!

     
  18. TRAVIS: Yup... but gee...it is so easy to play with them when they are out there

    MATT-MAN: hehehehe here is a tissue....

    108: Sorry, my sponsor from sex-aholics anonymous will not let me share ...

    PIA: heheh Brit was just here in Memphis I have heard... more excited about the Allman Brothers and Jerry Lee

    DOC: Do you really think I would have censored it????? That is the way I found it....

     
  19. Oh man the dirty water dog...wasn't that the name of her sex tape?!

    Great post and I really needed that giggle!

     
  20. Unknown Says:
  21. Excellent choice of pictures, Vinny. Thanks for the good laugh - but the vid.... the vid... the VIDEO! OMG! Who wants to touch THIS thing THERE???

     
  22. Tisha! Says:
  23. You are too funny Bond Baby!

    Rosie sure enjoyed Tyra massaging her hooters...I would have too :-}~

     
  24. Angell Says:
  25. I'm SO glad that this worked from home - I was having such problems with the computer at work. :D

    ROTFLMOO - my god. I've always known celebrities were human, but I'd laugh at those pics of the average Joe (or shudder in the case of one).

    But I've gotta agree with Trav. Gimmie good entertainment, keep their private lives that.

    Sex-a-holcis annonymous *snarf* - you missed the last four meetings...

    SMOOCHES

     
  26. Bud Fisher Says:
  27. You are nothing but ONE SICK PUPPY! Of course, that is why your blog is a MUST-READ!

     
  28. Meribah Says:
  29. Bwahahaha! Good choice of post, Bond! I think almost any one of us can be made to look weird if somebody followed us around with a camera all day, everyday. Good thing nobody is following me around...don't want the full extent of my neurotic strangeness to become known! LOL
    **Reads the comment that Bond has pictures of his self-fondling** Ooo! I'll show you mine if you show me yours...NOT!!!! :P

     
  30. Anonymous Says:
  31. The video, oh my Lord.

     
  32. Peg Says:
  33. Oh dear...Bond, you've captured such an excellent smattering...I think the one that I feel the worst for is Danny Devito, LOL

     
  34. STARR: LOL not sure if you know but the hot dog vendors in NYC have casts and the hot dogs sit in hot water

    SANNI: The vid was very scary

    ANGELL: never going to keep their lives private in our "need for news" world... and it was only three meetings

    BUD: Coming from you that is a true compliment...

    MERI: Yes, in many ways, that was the point of this post... the all seeing eyes of the public are always there

    MIMI: Hope I did not wrinkle your pencil skirt

    PEG: TY... that is some pose from the Dan-man

     
  35. BeckEye Says:
  36. Didn't Carnie Wilson just have a baby or something?

    LiLo's quote makes my brain hurt. Take my picture! Don't take my picture! Love me! Leave me alone!

     
  37. Go ahead, relabel and reorganize all of your old posts - ha! See if I care! I have ways of ignoring you...

     
  38. my word bond. the nutcases were out this week weren' they?

    smiles, bee

     
  39. BECKEYE: Did she? Eating chocolate covered strawberries is certainly not going to help though.

    SONGBIRD: I am done now... so you have to find a different way to ignore me now!

    BEE: And this week is different from the others how exactly? LOL

     
  40. Julie Says:
  41. Hmmm I didn't comment yet? Why oh why did I pause at these pictures again...and the video.....I do need therapy!

    Who wants to therapy me?

     
  42. Coco Says:
  43. OMG LOL
    I laughed until I drooled ...

    but I would like to point out one tiny detail ... Ms. Hilton is HOLDING the hotdog, but is she EATING it?

    and in conclusion: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

     

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